Here are some words, poetry and quotes I found comforting while grieving and looking for appropriate eulogy words to celebrate their lives.
I hope you find some comfort here too.
When Tomorrow Starts Without Me…
When tomorrow starts without me,
and I’m not there to see;
If the sun should rise and find your eyes,
all filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn’t cry,
the way you did today,
while thinking of the many things,
we didn’t get to say.
I know how much you love me,
as much as I love you,
and each time that you think of me,
I know you’ll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me,
please try to understand,
that an Angel came and called my name,
and took me by the hand,
and said my place was ready,
in heaven far above,
and that I’d have to leave behind,
all those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away,
a tear fell from my eye,
for all life, I’d always thought,
I didn’t want to die.
I had so much to live for,
so much yet to do,
it seemed almost impossible,
that I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
the good ones and the bad,
I thought of all the love we shared,
and all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday,
just even for awhile,
I’d say goodbye and kiss you
and maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized,
that this could never be,
for emptiness and memories,
would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things,
I might miss come tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
my heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven’s gates,
I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me,
from His great golden throne,
He said, “This is eternity,
and all I’ve promised you”.
Today for life on earth is past,
but here it starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
but today will always last,
and since each day’s the same day,
there’s no longing for the past.
But you have been so faithful,
so trusting and so true.
Though there were times you did some things,
you knew you shouldn’t do.
But you have been forgiven
and now at last you’re free.
So won’t you take my hand
and share my life with me?
So when tomorrow starts without me,
don’t think we’re far apart,
for every time you think of me,
I’m right here, in your heart.
David M. Romano
A Letter From Heaven
To my dearest family, some things I’d like to say,
Though first of all to let you know I arrived OK.
I’m writing this from heaven, here I dwell with Spirit above,
Here there’s no more tears of sadness, here is just eternal love.
Please do not be unhappy because I am out of sight,
Remember I am with you every morning, noon and night.
That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through,
Heavens warmth covered me and said “I welcome you”.
“It’s good to have you back again, you were missed while you were gone,
As for your dearest family, they’ll be here later on.
We need you here so badly, you’re part of our great plan,
There’s so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man.”
Spirit gave me a list of things that were wished for me to do,
And foremost on that list – was to watch and care for you.
And when you lie in your bed at night the day’s chores put to flight,
Spirit and I are closest to you…in the middle of the night.
When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years,
Because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears.
But do not be afraid to cry a while; it helps relieve the pain.
Remember there would no flowers unless there was some rain.
I wish I could explain to you all that Spirit has planned.
If I were to tell you, you would not understand.
One thing is for certain, though my life on earth is over,
I’m closer to you now than I ever was before.
There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb,
But together we can do it by taking one day at a time.
It was always my philosophy and I’d like it for you too;
That as you give unto the world, the world will give to you.
If you can help somebody who’s in sorrow and in pain,
Then you can say to me at night..”My day was not in vain”.
So now I am contented…that my life was worthwhile,
Knowing as I passed along the way I made somebody smile.
So if you meet someone who is sad and feeling low;
Just lend a hand to pick him up as on your way you go.
When you’re walking down the street and you’ve got me on your mind;
I’m walking in your footsteps, only half a step behind.
And when it’s time for you to go from that body to be free,
Remember you’re not going…you’re coming here to me.
*I would love to tell you who the author of this poem was, but this was sent to me by a friend who didn’t know the name of the one who wrote these thoughtful lines.
This poem was written by a very brave lady towards the end of her battle with breast cancer. It makes you think….
IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER
By Erma Bombeck
I would have invited friends over to dinner,
Even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the GOOD living room and
Worried much less about the dirt when someone
Wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen to
My grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would never have insisted the
Car windows be rolled up on a
Summer day because my hair had
Just been teased and sprayed.
I would have burned the pink candle
Sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.
I would have sat on the lawn with
My children and not worried about grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less
While watching television and more while watching life.
I would have gone to bed when I was sick
Instead of pretending the earth would go into a
Holding pattern if I wasn’t there for the day.
I would never have bought anything
Just because it was practical,
Wouldn’t show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy,
I’d have cherished every moment realizing that the
Wonderment growing inside me was the only chance
In life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said,
“Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.”
There would have been more, “I love you’s” and more,
“I’m sorry’s” but mostly, given another shot at life,
I would seize every minute …
look at it and really see it …
live it … and never give it back.
Mary Elizabeth Frye (1904-)
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight.
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there — I do not die
…this following version was amended by anon from the original…
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.
She Is Gone (He Is Gone)
You can shed tears that she is gone
Or you can smile because she has lived
You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back
Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her
Or you can be full of the love that you shared
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday
You can remember her and only that she is gone
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on
You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
Or you can do what she would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.
David Harkins
Remember Me
To the living, I am gone,
To the sorrowful, I will never return,
To the angry, I was cheated,
But to the happy, I am at peace,
And to the faithful, I have never left.
I cannot speak, but I can listen.
I cannot be seen, but I can be heard.
So as you stand upon a shore gazing at a beautiful sea,
As you look upon a flower and admire its simplicity,
Remember me.
Remember me in your heart:
Your thoughts, and your memories,
Of the times we loved,
The times we cried,
The times we fought,
The times we laughed.
For if you always think of me, I will never have gone.
Margaret Mead
Don’t Cry for Me
Don’t cry for me now I have died, for I’m still here I’m by your side,
My body’s gone but my soul is here, please don’t shed another tear,
I am still here I’m all around, only my body lies in the ground.
I am the snowflake that kisses your nose,
I am the frost, that nips your toes.
I am the sun, bringing you light,
I am the star, shining so bright.
I am the rain, refreshing the earth,
I am the laughter, I am the mirth.
I am the bird, up in the sky,
I am the cloud, that’s drifting by.
I am the thoughts, inside your head,
While I’m still there, I can’t be dead.
Anon
There is no death!
What seems so is transition;
This life of mortal breath
Is but a suburb of the life elysian,
Whose portal we call death.
~ Henry W. Longfellow
What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.
I’m Free
Don’t Grieve for me for now I’m free,
I’m following the path God has laid you see.
I took His hand when I heard Him call,
I turned my back and left it all.
I could not stay another day,
To laugh, to love, to work, to play.
Tasks left undone must stay that way,
I found that peace at the close of day.
If my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joys.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss,
Oh, yes, these things I too will miss.
Be not burdened with times of sorrow.
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.
My life’s been full, I’ve savored much,
Good friends, good times, a loved one’s touch.
Perhaps my time seemed all too brief,
Don’t lengthen it now with undue grief.
Lift up your hearts and peace to thee,
God wanted me now, He set me free
Rupert Brooke 1887 – 1915
The Soldier
If I should die, think only this of me:
That there’s some corner of a foreign field
That is for ever England. There shall be
In that rich earth a richer dust concealed;
A dust whom England bore, shaped, made aware,
Gave, once, her flowers to love, her ways to roam,
A body of England’s, breathing English air,
Washed by the rivers, blest by suns of home.
And think, this heart, all evil shed away,
A pulse in the eternal mind, no less
Gives somewhere back the thoughts by England given;
Her sights and sounds; dreams happy as her day;
And laughter, learnt of friends; and gentleness,
In hearts at peace, under an English heaven.
Henry Van Dyke 1852 – 1933
Parable of Immortality
I am standing by the seashore.
A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze
and starts for the blue ocean.
She is an object of beauty and strength,
and I stand and watch until at last she hangs like a peck of white cloud
just where the sun and sky come down to mingle with each other.
Then someone at my side says :
– ‘There she goes!
Gone where?
Gone from my sight – that is all.
She is just as large in mast and hull and spar
as she was when she left my side
and just as able to bear her load of living freight
to the places of destination.
Her diminished size is in me, not in her.
And just at the moment when someone at my side says:
– ‘There she goes! ‘,
there are other eyes watching her coming,
and other voices ready to take up the glad shout :
– ‘Here she comes!’
Death is nothing at all
Death is nothing at all.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
I am I and you are you,
Whatever we were to each other, that we still are.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference in your tone,
wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow,
laugh as we always laughed
at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Pray smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word
that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effort,
without the trace of a shadow in it.
Life means all that it ever meant,
it is the same as it ever was.
There is unbroken continuity,
why should I be out of mind
because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you
somewhere very near
just around the corner.
All is well
Christina Georgina Rossetti 1830 – 1894
Remember
Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you planned:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.
Let Me Go
When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me
I want no rites in a gloom filled room
Why cry for a soul set free?
Miss me a little, but not for long
And not with your head bowed low
Remember the love that once we shared
Miss me, but let me go.
For this is a journey we all must take
And each must go alone.
It’s all part of the master plan
A step on the road to home.
When you are lonely and sick at heart
Go to the friends we know.
Laugh at all the things we used to do
Miss me, but let me go.
Christina Rossetti
Angel
Tear drops, slow and steady, The pain so real and true,
God took another angel, And that angel, dear, was you.
Angel wings, upon the clouds, Your body softly sleeps,
Hush now little angel, No more tears you have to weep.
Little prayers are sent to you, The short life you led;
Your family will never forget you, So rest your little head.
I know God will look after you, Now you are truly alive,
Your spirit soars beyond the moon, Your legacy will survive.
You’re beautiful, you’re endless, Now stretch your wings and fly,
You’re loved by so many, It will never be goodbye.
Close your pretty eyes, No more tears, just go and rest,
Let your soul lie peacefully, We know you did your best.
Anon
Anon
Pardon Me for Not Getting Up
Oh dear, if you’re reading this right now,
I must have given up the ghost.
I hope you can forgive me for being
Such a stiff and unwelcoming host.
Just talk amongst yourself my friends,
And share a toast or two.
For I am sure you will remember well
How I loved to drink with you.
Don’t worry about mourning me,
I was never easy to offend.
Feel free to share a story at my expense
And we’ll have a good laugh at the end.
Anon
I Am Free
Don’t grieve for me, for now I’m free,
I’m following the path God laid for me.
I took His hand when I heard Him call,
I turned my back and left it all.
I could not stay another day, to laugh,
To love, to work or play.
Tasks undone must stay that way
I’ve found that peace at the close of the day.
If parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss,
Ah, yes, these things I too will miss.
Be not burdened with times of sorrow
I wish for you the sunshine of tomorrow.
My life’s been full, I savoured much
Good friends, good times, a loved one’s touch.
Perhaps my time seemed all too brief,
Don’t lengthen it now with undue grief.
Lift up your hearts and share with me,
God wants me now, He set me free.
Shannon Lee Moseley
Afterglow
I’d like the memory of me to be a happy one.
I’d like to leave an afterglow of smiles when life is done.
I’d like to leave an echo whispering softly down the ways,
Of happy times and laughing times and bright and sunny days.
I’d like the tears of those who grieve, to dry before the sun;
Of happy memories that I leave when life is done.
If I Should Go Tomorrow
If I should go tomorrow
It would never be goodbye,
For I have left my heart with you,
So don’t you ever cry.
The love that’s deep within me,
Shall reach you from the stars,
You’ll feel it from the heavens,
And it will heal the scars.
Anon
The Star
A light went out on Earth for me
The day we said goodbye
And on that day a star was born,
The brightest in the sky
Reaching through the darkness
With its rays of purest white
Lighting up the Heavens
As it once lit up my life
With beams of love to heal
The broken heart you left behind
Where always in my memory
Your lovely star will shine
Anon
A Song of Living
Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.
I have sent up my gladness on wings, to be lost in the blue of the sky.
I have run and leaped with the rain,
I have taken the wind to my breast.
My cheek like a drowsy child
to the face of the earth I have pressed.
Because I have loved life,
I shall have no sorrow to die.
Amelia Josephine Burr
I’m There Inside Your Heart
Right now I’m in a different place
And though we seem apart
I’m closer than I ever was,
I’m there inside your heart.
I’m with you when you greet each day
And while the sun shines bright
I’m there to share the sunsets, too
I’m with you every night.
I’m with you when the times are good
To share a laugh or two,
And if a tear should start to fall
I’ll still be there for you.
And when that day arrives
That we no longer are apart,
I’ll smile and hold you close to me,
Forever in my heart.
Anon
To Those Whom I love & Those Who Love Me
When I am gone, release me, let me go.
I have so many things to see and do,
You mustn’t tie yourself to me with too many tears,
But be thankful we had so many good years.
I gave you my love, and you can only guess
How much you’ve given me in happiness.
I thank you for the love that you have shown,
But now it is time I travelled on alone.
So grieve for me a while, if grieve you must,
Then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It is only for a while that we must part,
So treasure the memories within your heart.
I won’t be far away for life goes on.
And if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can’t see or touch me, I will be near.
And if you listen with your heart, you’ll hear,
All my love around you soft and clear.
And then, when you come this way alone,
I’ll greet you with a smile and a ‘Welcome Home’.
Anon
Because I Love You So
Time will not dim the face I love,
The voice I heard each day,
The many things you did for me,
In your own special way.
All my life I’ll miss you,
As the years come and go,
But in my heart I’ll keep you,
Because I love you so.
Anon
One At Rest
Think of me as one at rest,
for me you should not weep
I have no pain no troubled thoughts
for I am just asleep
The living thinking me that was,
is now forever still
And life goes on without me now,
as time forever will.
If your heart is heavy now
because I’ve gone away
Dwell not long upon it friend
For none of us can stay
Those of you who liked me,
I sincerely thank you all
And those of you who loved me,
I thank you most of all.
And in my fleeting lifespan,
as time went rushing by
I found some time to hesitate,
to laugh, to love, to cry
Matters it now if time began
If time will ever cease?
I was here, I used it all,
and now I am at peace.
Anon
Funeral Blues
Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let airplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message “He is Dead”,
Put Crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday-rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk , my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong
The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood,
For nothing now can ever come to any good
H. Auden
Come with me
God saw you getting tired
And a cure was not to be
So He put His arms around you
And whispered ‘Come with Me.’
With tearful eyes
We watched you suffer
And saw you fade away,
Although we loved you dearly
We could not make you stay.
A golden heart stopped beating,
Hard working hands at rest,
God broke our hearts to prove
He only takes the best.
It’s lonesome here without you,
We miss you more each day,
Life doesn’t seem the same
Since you’ve gone away.
When days are sad and lonely
And everything goes wrong,
We seem to hear you whisper
‘Cheer up and carry on.’
Each time we see your picture,
You seem to smile and say
‘Don’t cry, I’m in God’s keeping
We’ll meet again someday.’
You never said ‘I’m leaving’,
You never said goodbye,
You were gone before we knew it,
And only God knew why.
A million times we needed you,
A million times we cried,
If love alone could have saved you,
You never would have died.
In life we loved you dearly,
In death we love you still ,
In our hearts you hold a place,
That no one could ever fill.
It broke our hearts to lose you,
But you didn’t go alone,
For part of us went with you,
The day God took you home.
Rhonda Braswell
Gone, But Not Forgotten
Don’t think of her/him as gone away
Her/His journey’s just begun,
Life holds so many facets
This earth is only one.
Just think of her/him as resting
From the sorrows and the tears
In a place of warmth and comfort
Where there are no days and years.
Think how she/he must be wishing
That we could know today
How nothing but our sadness
Can really pass away.
And think of her/him as living
In the hearts of those she/he touched
For nothing loved is ever lost
And she/he was loved so much.
Ellen Brenneman
How Did They Live?
Not, how did they die, but how did they live?
Not, what did they gain, but what did they give?
These are the units to measure the worth
Of a person as a person, regardless of birth.
Not, what was their church, nor what was their creed?
But had they befriended those really in need?
Were they ever ready, with a word of good cheer,
To bring back a smile, to banish a tear?
Not, what did the sketch in the newspaper say,
But how many were sorry when they passed away?
Anon
Bright be the Place of Thy Soul
Bright be the place of thy soul!
No lovelier spirit than thine
E’er burst from its mortal control,
In the orbs of the blessed to shine.
On earth thou wert all but divine,
As thy soul shall immortally be;
And our sorrow may cease to repine,
When we know that thy God is with thee.
Light be the turf of thy tomb!
May its verdure like emeralds be:
There should not be the shadow of gloom
In aught that reminds us of thee.
Young flowers and an evergreen tree
May spring from the spot of thy rest:
But nor cypress nor yew let us see;
For why should we mourn for the blest?
ROBERT SOUTHEY 1774 – 1843
Among His Books
My days among the Dead are past;
Around me I behold,
Where’er these casual eyes are cast,
The mighty minds of old:
MY never-failing friends are they,
With whom I converse day by day.
With them I take delight in weal
And seek relief in woe;
And while I understand and feel
How much to them I owe,
My cheeks have often been bedewed
With tears of thoughtful gratitude.
My thoughts are with the Dead; with them
I live in long-past years,
Their virtues love, their faults condemn,
Partake their hopes and fears,
And from their lessons seek and find
Instruction with an humble mind.
MY hopes are with the Dead; anon
My place with them will be,
And I with them shall travel on
Through all Futurity;
Yet leaving here a name, I trust,
That will not perish in the dust.
RICHARD CRASHAW 1613-1649
An Epitaph upon Husband and Wife who Died
and were Buried Together
To these, whom death again did wed,
This grave’s the second marriage-bed.
For though the hand of Fate could force,
‘Twixt soul and body a divorce,
It could not sever man and wife,
Because they both lived but one life.
Peace, good reader, do not weep;
Peace, the lovers are asleep:
They, sweet turtles, folded lie,
In the last knot that love could tie.
Let them sleep, let them sleep on,
Till this stormy night be gone.
And the eternal morrow dawn,
Then the curtains will be drawn,
And they waken with that light,
Whose day shall never sleep in night.
JOHN FLETCHER 1579-1625
Weep no More
Weep no more, nor sigh, nor groan,
Sorrow calls no time that’s gone:
Violets pluck’d, the sweetest rain
Makes not fresh nor grow again.
Trim thy locks, look cheerfully;
Fate’s hid ends eyes cannot see.
John Donne 1572-1631
Holy Sonnets X
Death be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for, thou art not so,
For, those, whom thou think’st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul’s delivery.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy, or charms can make us sleep as well,
And better than thy stroke; why swell’st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.
JOHN CLARE 1793-1864
Infants’ Graves
Infants’ graves are steps of angels, where
Earth’s brightest gems of innocence repose.
God is their parent, and they need no tear,
He takes them to his bosom from earth’s woes,
A bud their lifetime and a flower their close.
Their spirits are an Iris of the skies,
Needing no prayers; a sunset’s happy close,
Gone are the bright rays of their soft blue eyes;
Flowers weep in dewdrops o’er them, and the gale gently sighs.
Their lives were nothing but a sunny shower,
Melting on flowers as tears melt from the eye,
Their deaths were dewdrops on heaven’s amaranth bower,
And tolled on flowers as summer gales went by.
They bowed and trembled, and they left no sigh,
And the sun smiled to show their end was well.
Infants have naught to weep for ere they die;
All prayers are needless, beads they need not tell,
White flowers their mourners are, nature their passing-bell.
There is no such thing as “Death”.
Everything in creation is energy.
Energy cannot die. It simply transforms.
We grieve because we miss the company of the one we loved.
We miss touching them and sharing the journey together.
Letting go is painful. It is difficult to see that ‘death’ is in fact a new beginning.
Guidance
I pretend I do not know you yet you are always by my side,
warning me to tell the children not to run into the street
or go too close to the edge of the river, urging me to drive carefully.
You govern my life, yet you have no name for I have not given you one.
But when I meet you face-to-face you are not always so terrifying
for you make me aware of how much I can love.
~ Anonymous
Tears are sometimes an inappropriate response to death.
When a life has been lived completely honestly,
completely successfully, or just completely,
the correct response to death’s perfect punctuation mark is a smile.
~ Julie Burchill
Unable are the Loved to die
For Love is Immortality.
~ Emily Dickinson
“The Rose”
It’s the heart afraid of dying, that never learns to dance;
It’s the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the chance;
It’s the one who won’t be taken, who cannot seem to give;
And the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live.
~ Bette Midler
Suicide is about life, being in fact the sincerest form of criticism life gets.
~ Wilfrid Sheed
Suicide sometimes proceeds from cowardice, but not always; for cowardice sometimes prevents it;
since as many live because they are afraid to die, as die because they are afraid to live.
~ Charles Caleb Colton, 1829
Expect trouble as an inevitable part of life and repeat to yourself,
the most comforting words of all; This, too, shall pass.
~ Ann Landers
‘Death’ is a natural cycle of life,
the transformation of consciousness and states of energy and information
from which we move into higher and more refined vibratory frequencies.
Click here for some practical advice on Coping with Grief
I believe that life continues beyond death and that I have received proof many times. To read what I have learned about life on the Other Side… Click here